


Cry If You Want To

by Amethystia



Category: Tortall - Tamora Pierce
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-02-25
Updated: 2014-10-27
Packaged: 2017-12-03 14:51:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 3,277
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/699436
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Amethystia/pseuds/Amethystia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Thayet finds a young girl in an abandoned bandit camp. She takes her in and raises her as her own. But the girl has the strangest eyes and rumors start. And even the Gods have some part to play.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Strange Eyes

Thayet and the Riders burst through the last line of trees and into the clearing that the bandits used as a base. All that was left seemed to be a few chickens. But nonetheless they searched the camp.  
“Your Majesty? We found someone!” One of the Riders called, crouching behind a crate. Thayet came running and to her surprise found a small girl of no more than 8 huddled there. Thayet called for a blanket and one was draped around the young girl’s shoulders.  
Thayet crouched in front of the girl and asked, “What’s your name, little one?”  
The girl looked up and Thayet and the Riders gasped. One of her eyes was deep purple, just like Alanna’s, and the other was an electric blue, like that of the Conté line.  
The girl stared at her and whispered, “My name is Annabella. My mama calls—called—me Annie.”  
Thayet saw the sadness in the girl’s eyes and smiled sympathetically.  
Then she said, “Annabella, could you – only if you want to – tell us what happened?”  
Annabella took a deep breath and said, “Last night, just after supper, they came and attacked our village. They burned a lot of buildings and started taking people. They took me, my mama, and my older sister. The k-killed all my little brothers and sisters. And-and they cut off my daddy’s head. Everybody was screaming and there was fire everywhere. Then they brought us here. They-they hurt all the women they took, and-and made me w-watch.” Annabella couldn’t say another word. She hugged her knees and sobbed.  
Thayet reached out and put her arms around the sobbing girl.  
“Shh, everything’s going to be fine. No one’s going to hurt you now.” She stroked the little girl’s hair and murmured soothing words.  
Then she looked up at the Riders and said, “Let’s go home.” She picked up the sobbing girl and mounted her horse. She put the girl in front of her and led the Riders back towards the palace.


	2. A New Home and a Rumour

After the queen arrived back at the palace a series of things began to happen. First, a set of rooms in the royal wing were given to a girl with no connections or known past. There were whispers about this girl, known as Annabella. Some said she was a witch who had put a spell on the queen. Others said she was just an orphan whom the queen had taken a liking too.   
Then, when walking past Annabella, Alanna the Lioness, the King’s Champion, had fainted. The reason for this was unknown until someone had looked more closely at the girl’s eyes. One was purple, like those of the Lioness, and the other was bright blue, like that of the whole Conté line. More rumours circulated and crazy stories began to be heard.   
But two people completely ignored the rumours, the queen and a young boy of Annabella’s age. This boy was the second son of two of the lands most famous people, Veralidaine Sarrasri and Numair Salmalin. The boy, named William, had taken a liking to Annabella and they played together a lot.   
But there was another rumour, a worse one, that was circulating, whispered in corners, by nobles and servants alike. It had to do with Annabella’s mysterious parentage. It was believed that she was the unknown child of Alanna the Lioness and King Jonathon. See, this was all speculation, no one knew that they’d actually been together.   
So when the few that did, Raoul of Goldenlake, Gareth the Younger of Naxen, George of Pirate’s Swoop, they began to worry that it could possibly be true. When George, who had the sight, looked at her, he saw she had three auras, and aura of the Gift, an aura of wild magic (which Numair had taught him to see), and an aura of semi-godhood or possibly god-touched, he wasn’t sure which. George called together all those he knew for sure knew about Alanna and Jon’s little fling, including Alanna and Jon.   
He told them what he had seen. They all knew of the rumour and knew that was part of the reason they were all together. Alanna insisted it wasn’t possible, that she would have known, and besides the girl was much too young, her own children were older. But then they remembered that there had been another purple-eyed person, Alanna’s twin, Thom. But he was dead.   
They tried to reason it out.  
“She’s eight or nine years old and Thom died…how long ago?” George asked, looking at Alanna.   
“More than that, it isn’t possible.” Alanna sighed, “She isn’t my daughter; that much I know. But Thom is a very skilled mage; he could have been brought back to life without our knowledge. He might have conceived a child then, but the eyes don’t make sense, no human has two different color eyes!” Alanna continued trying it reason it out.  
Gareth added, “But we also thought that humans couldn’t have purple eyes and that girl’s couldn’t be knights. But you proved both those stereo-types wrong. And if what George Saw is true and that she is either god-touched or a demi-goddess with both the Gift and wild magic, all of which we know exist, then the gods must have given her those eyes for some reason that we are not yet aware of.   
Alanna flushed red with anger and cried, “So were just going to have to endure this rumour?!?”   
Gareth smiled peaceably at her and simply said, “Yes.” With that Alanna stormed out of the room and ran directly into Annabella.   
“Oh, um – sorry.” Alanna muttered and took off down the hall. Annabella stared after her, confused.  
“Did I do something?” She asked looking at the others with those eyes that had featured so much in their recent discussion. They were all speechless. What had caused her to appear just as they were discussing her? Was it coincidence or was she really god-touched?   
George took it in stride and said, “You did nothin’, lass. She’s just not in a great mood.” Annabella looked down.  
“The rumours,” She muttered. Everyone’s eyes widened. So she had heard the rumours? Oh, that was weird.  
“What rumours d’you know, lass?” George asked her.   
“All of them.” She whispered in reply. If it was possible, everyone’s eyes widened even more. She looked down.  
“William likes to listen at doors.”   
Jon asked, “William? Oh Daine and Numair’s son. Ugh, they have too many kids to keep track of.” Jon looked down at the young girl his wife had rescued and taken in.  
“Annabella,” He asked, “Do you know why you have two different colored eyes?”   
Annabella gulped and nodded, everyone gasped.   
“I only found out last night and I was coming to tell you,” Annabella said before taking a deep breath and continuing, “Last night I was visited by four gods. Mithros and the Goddess and two lesser gods, Wieryn, the god of the hunt, and The Green Lady, his wife and goddess of child birthing and gardens in the north.”  
When she paused Jon said, “Those are Daine’s parents!” Annabella just nodded, she knew.  
Then she continued, “I am only allowed to tell you part of what happened next. Mithros and the Goddess told me that I was their daughter, but only inadvertently, when they were occupying the humans I always thought were my parents. They gave me the eyes to mark me as a daughter of two great gods, something that has never happened before. They and the lesser gods spoke to me, and to William, at length.”  
They all looked confused and Jon asked, “They spoke to William too? Why?”  
Annabella shook her head, “I—I can’t tell you.” She looked at her feet. Jon decided to let it go, he could see it was obviously something she didn’t want to talk about.   
Annabella then looked up at Jonathon, “Your majesty, do you know where Thayet is? I was trying to find her.” Thayet had insisted right from the first moment that Annabella call her by her name and after a few firm remindings, it had become second nature.   
Jon shook his head, saying, “I was wondering where she was myself.” Annabella shrugged and darted off down the hall. The adults stared after her in awe.


	3. How do you know?

Seven years had passed since the revelation of Annabella’s parentage. Annabella was now sixteen years old. Everyone who knew of her parentage treated her with a mixture of reverence, admiration and fear. Everyone except Thayet and William. Thayet treated her like a doting mother would treat a treasured daughter. And William, well, he loved her, with all his heart, but something his grandparents had said weighed on his mind. They had told him that he had to love her. It was not his choice, he had to. But he knew that he truly did, from the moment he had seen her, seven years ago. And she seemed to love him in return, although she had been told the same thing. But Annabella wasn’t so sure that William actually loved her, so she went to Thayet.  
“Thayet,” She asked, “how do you know if someone loves you, is in love with you? How do you know?”  
Thayet smiled at the girl she had found all those years ago and said, “You’ll know. But let me tell you how I knew that King Jonathan loved me.”  
Her eyes twinkled as she began her story, “I was once a princess of Saraine, but my father exiled me. When Alanna the Lioness came to my country to retrieve the Dominion Jewel, she encountered me, and my friend, Buri. We helped her to complete her task and she brought us back here, to this court. I was to be married to Jonathan, who was already the King at this time. I was sad at having been exiled and because of my mother’s death. I cried a lot, but the one thing everybody told me not to cry when I was alone with the King. But one time I did. I had loved him from the moment I had first set eyes one him but I didn’t know if he loved me, until that moment. I managed to choke out through my tears, ‘They told me not to cry in front of you.’ He smiled at me with such love and said, ‘Cry if you want to,’ then he kissed me lightly on the cheek and I knew. I knew that he loved me and I loved him. That’s how and when I knew.” Thayet finished.  
Annabella looked up at her, still slightly confused, but understanding more than she had before.   
“Thanks, Thayet.”  
Then she left, pondering the story the Queen had told her. She walked to her room and sat on her bed. She was unaware that William was at the very moment on his way to her rooms. In his pocket was a small velvet box. There was a spring in his step that was contradicted by the thoughtful frown on his face. Everyone he passed looked at him in confusion. He was thinking, and thinking hard, about whether or not this was the right thing to do. He knew that this was what the gods wanted, but was it what he wanted? But when he knocked on her door and saw her as she opened it, he knew that this was the right thing. But he saw the remnants of tears in her eyes and on her cheeks. He put his hand to her cheek.  
“Sweetling,” He used one of the terms of endearment learned from his father, “What’s wrong?”   
She just looked up at him and said, “I’ve been thinking.”  
He nodded and said, “So have I.”  
Then he led her back into the room and they sat on the bed. Annabella put her head in her hands and suddenly burst into tears. William put his arms around her and murmured to her, “Cry if you want to, cry if you want to.”  
She looked up at him and blinked. She knew, just as Thayet had known, that she wanted to be with this boy forever.   
“I love you, William,” She whispered as she too put her arms around him.   
William, in response, hugged her close and murmured, “I love you, too.”  
Then he pulled away and brought out the small velvet box. She gasped when she saw it. He smiled and kneeled in front of her and opened the box. Inside was a beautiful ring, with diamonds, rubies, amethysts and sapphires.   
He said, “Annabella, my love, my sweet, will you marry me?”   
Annabella smiled and said, “Yes, dear William, I will.” He slipped the ring onto her finger. Then they embraced, kissing passionately. Tears prickled Annabella’s eyes, but this time they were tears of joy. For now she was truly happy. Now she understood what Thayet had meant. She would know, and now she did. You couldn’t explain something like this, like love. Love was different for everyone. Now Annabella knew that love was meant to be treasured. You will always know what love is, there is always that one moment that it becomes crystal clear.   
Annabella knew that one day she would be explaining this to her own children, just as the Queen had explained it to her.


	4. For The Gods

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter has the beginnings of a lemon at the end but I wanted to keep the rating as it was so I made it a fade to black lemon. I hope you all enjoy this chapter. Hopefully I’ll be updating quicker from now on. So read, review and enjoy!

Mithros watched his daughter. She bounced around, happy and content. Her strange eyes twinkling with happiness. She was preparing for her wedding, which was to take place that night. Mithros, the Great Mother Goddess, Weiryn and the Green Lady were planning to attend this wedding that they had been waiting more than sixteen years for. The union of a child and grandchild of gods. Something that had never happened in the history of the human race. This was one special event. Mithros was especially proud of this daughter of his. She was his and the Great Mother’s though human born, a strange thing. Her eyes though, he was especially proud of his stroke of inspiration to give her those. It marked her as special, made her stand out. As the child of two of the great gods should stand out. Mithros set about polishing his best armor and his sunshield. He wanted to look his best for his daughter’s wedding. No one but Veralidaine, Weiryn and the Green Lady’s daughter and William’s mother, knew that the gods were going to attend this wedding. Not hidden either, in full view and in all their godly glory.   
Meanwhile, Annabella scurried about, making sure everything was going as planned and so far it was. Everyone treated her with the utmost respect and did exactly as she asked. Finally it was time to get into her beautiful dress. The white lace and silk creation, made by the Queen’s own seamstresses, swept the floor gracefully as she twirled in front of the mirror. It was then that Mithros and the Goddess appeared. She jumped, nearly tripping over the long skirt of her dress.   
“We have come to attend your wedding, my daughter,” Mithros’ booming voice rang out. Annabella looked at them in awe. Then he continued, “This wedding is not just for mortals, it is also for the Gods.” Something in his voice changed as he said ‘For the Gods’, something with a hint of greater purpose. But of course, excited as she was, did not notice. She just smiled.   
A maid, coming in to tidy the dress, saw the Gods and gasped. But she curtsied to them and set about her work. Soon Annabella was completely ready and it was time. A delighted smile graced her face as she and her parents left the room and proceeded to the chapel where the wedding was being held. The Goddess went to sit next to Veralidaine, Numair, the two lesser gods and the monarchs. Mithros took his daughter’s arm and led her down the aisle. William waited under an arch of flowers. A priest of the sun waited to perform the marriage and nearly fainted when he saw Mithros. Not everyone had been aware of Annabella’s parentage and this priest obviously hadn’t been.   
Mithros and Annabella finally reached the end of the aisle and Mithros placed Annabella’s hand in William’s. The priest began to speak. As the ceremony came to a close, Annabella and William shared their first kiss as husband and wife. Everyone moved to the grand ballroom for the reception. The Gods, all four of them, danced with their new extended family. Annabella danced with her father, her new father-in-law, her new grand-father-in-law, William, her new brother-in-law Rikash, and King Jonathon. William danced with Annabella, his new mother-in-law, his mother, his sister Sarralyn, his grandmother, and Queen Thayet. They danced until the hour grew late. Then, just around midnight, the newly-weds retired to the suite of rooms that had been prepared for them. All their belongings had already been moved there. William swept Annabella into his arms as he entered the room. He placed her gently on the bed and they began to take off each other’s clothes. Annabella pulled her anti-pregnancy charm off her neck. Then they submerged into bliss. Bur this was not just for themselves, it was also for the Gods.


	5. Impossibilities

Annabella had her eyes closed as she sat in Alanna’s examining room. She had now been pregnant for two months and Alanna was about to tell her the gender of the child. But then Alanna gasped.   
Annabella’s eyes flew open, “What?” She asked, her voice frightened.   
Alanna looked at her with wide eyes and said, “You’re going to have ten children, five male, five female. It’s impossible.”  
Annabella’s eyes widened too.   
“What’s going to happen?”   
Alanna shrugged.  
“I have no idea; your parents are Great Gods, after all.”  
Annabella closed her eyes once more and took a deep breath.   
“Will the all be OK?” She asked.  
Alanna shrugged again.  
“It’s impossible to tell,” She responded.   
Annabella nodded and left. When she returned to her and William’s rooms, the four gods were there, and Daine, her mother-in-law. William was talking to them. He jumped up when she entered and pulled her into his arms.  
“So what did Alanna say?” He asked, stroking her hair.   
She squeezed her eyes shut and said, “We’re having ten children, five girls and five boys.” She felt his arms tighten around her momentarily. She opened her eyes and looked up at him. The gods and Daine watched them.   
He looked down at her and said, “But that’s impossible!” Annabella just smiled up at him.  
“I know, but it’s true,” She said.   
The Goddess stepped forward and spoke, “Not only will you have ten children, my dears, but they will all have the Gift and Wild Magic.”   
William looked at her and exclaimed, “All of them? But that’s impossible!” She just smiled back at him.  
“But it is true,” She said simply. Then Annabella turned and asked her mother the same question she had asked Alanna.  
“Will they all be OK?”  
The Goddess looked at her.  
“Even we gods find that impossible to know.”  
Annabella sighed. This world was far too full of impossibilities.


	6. Notice of Discontinuation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just a quick Author's note on the future of this story.

Sorry to disappoint anyone, but I have decided not to continue this story. I started it a very long time ago and can hardly bare to think about it anymore.

If anyone wishes to adopt this story, as long as you credit me, then I have no problem. PM me if you wish to adopt this story. Please include the title of the story, as I will have a bunch of stories that could potentially be adopted at this point.

Thank you, and I am so very sorry if you liked this story.


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